As I embark on this exciting journey to transform myself to a better version of me I started debating about the real definition and meaning of success. Working as a coach and inspirational speaker, I started asking myself questions like:
- Am I a successful person?
- Have I ever been successful?
- Will I be successful in the future?
I soon realized that success is really all relative. If we use the traditional structures enforced by our society, the definition of success is “Having achieved fame, wealth, or social status” such as an actor, professional athlete, or millionaire businessman. In my opinion, this is only a limited and biased definition of a successful person. Someone can still feel successful without being famous or rich because he or she is feeling accomplished and has a purpose in life. If I ask 10 different people what success is,more than likely, I will receive 10 different answers. Everybody has their own idea of success and what that means – and possibly with the lowest common denominator being money. The truth then, is that success is a relative idea and it may vary on each person’s historical and environmental background which gives them their own individual perspective.
Another common mistake is adopting someone else's view or idea of success as our own. When we do this, we set ourselves up for disappointment and frustration. We are, indeed, too different from others to hold ourselves to the same standard of success. Everyone has a different story, experiences and background so we can’t compare ourselves to them objectively.
In the western world success is often measured by material possessions. In the US you are considered a success if you have a “good” and lucrative job or business, a nice house, a fancy car, a nice wardrobe, jewelry and vacation multiple times a year. However, to understand how relative success can be, in a place like Malawi in Southeast Africa, you are a success if you can bring home food to feed your family or provide then with safe shelter.
My personal idea of success has changed and shifted during the years and now I believe that success is not necessarily about having material things or making money. It is more about how I can impact and make a positive difference in people's lives. It is about how I can inspire and motivate people to give them hope and positivity. I want to show them how to find the answer inside themselves, rather than outside themselves.
I am not saying that financial stability is not important. Money is functional and you do need it to a certain extent to survive and thrive. Money is for me a tool and not the final goal of my actions and can be used to influence other people lives. For example, donating and supporting others and giving back to our community. Money can help us to impact more lives and leave a legacy faster and more efficiently.
In my new way of living and “being”, I realized that to be successful, I should stop complaining and move from living on the “Cause side” of the equation to the “Effect side”. This left me with the result of feeling a great sense of accomplishment and personal empowerment. Living on the “cause side of the equation” means understanding we can and will influence and change our lives rather than be influenced by them and feel incapable of determining the future.
- Define your own success, it’s unique and subjective
- Don’t compare yourself to others to define success.
- Look for your purpose and mission in life.
- Clarify your vision and legacy.
- Understand the real “value of money” and its purpose.
- Consider money as a tool and not only the goal of your actions.
- Work on personal development and self-awareness.
How I can support you?
In my journey to find my purpose, I realized that my vision is actually helping others find their vision. That’s why I am working as a coach and sharing with others my learnings, knowledge, and tools to achieve happiness, wealth, and freedom.
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